The perks of submission…
All along my life, I struggled with not voicing my opinions. I always spoke up even as a little kid. I had this strong sense of right and wrong and fought tooth and nail for what I believed was mine, or for the ideologies I stood by. Loud and opinionated I came to be called, whether it was among my social circle/family/colleagues in school and college. It was one thing everybody knew about me.
It was also the reason why people always threw me to the wolves when it came to the bigger stuff, stuff that mattered. Stuff that nobody wanted to be put in the spotlight with. They all wanted the perks but never wanted to go through the grind. So they cajoled me to lead while cheering in the backdrop with no real world contribution whatsoever. People would come and tell me “Hey, I am glad you spoke up. You did the right thing”, while not backing me up with any kind of support.
In turn I got reprimanded, targeted, ostracized and turned into this proverbial black sheep of the family; the one who always looked for trouble. People termed quiet submission as respect and being opinionated as the lack of it. Seniority was never to be questioned or challenged even in good faith; it had to be obeyed.
There was no room for discussion or entertaining any other school of thought. No nurturing or giving impetus to new ideas, only following the herd. To sum it up , make your life and career deadpan boring. If I had juniors, I would want ideas to be ricocheted and the best ones to be implemented. Why not? Or multiple ideas tried and tested before choosing the prized and most practical one. We are training people not dogs to play fetch.
That is how I suppose one innovates and what wonderful administrators are made of. It is not the ones with a sheep mentality that make a difference though they may be the ones making the cut for the sole reason that people love conformists. It gives them an ego massage and no challenges means following the rut of already established protocols. It is easier that way. Nobody wants a rebel.
Speaking of rebels; I do not believe in causeless rebellion. The kind some people with an inherent oppositional defiant disorder try to pull off. It only reinforces some wannabe’s irrelevant need for acting out and that in the workplace needs fixing. I don’t always react but I always notice. Obedience is required in certain arenas for eg: The military because every individual cannot be doing their own thing there; or on the sports field when you are playing as a team or a group project when somebody else is leading, though even there ideas should be welcomed and respected.
Respect for me isn’t about greeting your seniors some good morning/good evening. What if I am not having a good morning? I might choose to wish if I am actually having a pleasant morning. It’s like a varna system at the workplace where only the juniors need to wish their seniors with the Englishman’s style of greeting. I usually greet with an informal ‘Hello’ unless people specifically want to be wished a good morning. I honestly find it something ‘out of character’ to do. It is just an unnecessary custom that people followed over the ages.
Respect to me is measuring up when needed. What I mean is, be respectful of the hierarchy, do your allotted work dutifully to the best of your capability and forgo the compulsive bootlicking. Also, do not throttle ideas or suggestions irrespective of whom it is coming from.
Being submissive does make life easier. It comes with it’s perks. I prefer being myself and thoroughly enjoy the company of the ones who can question and challenge, those who can stand up for themselves and others around them. I like conscientious individuals. The world is full of conformists. I would prefer it to have a few lesser.
